- In a National Debt Relief survey, 54% of Americans said a partner's debt is a reason to divorce.
- 3 in 5 considered putting off marriage to avoid getting saddled with their partner's debt.
- Younger generations are becoming increasingly financially-minded about marriage.
For many couples, it's 'til debt do we part.
More and more Americans would rather be unmarried than saddled with debt. That's according to a survey of 2,000 people by the debt settlement company National Debt Relief.
Three in five Americans have considered putting off marriage to avoid inheriting their partner's debt, and most also believe that a significant other's debt is a legitimate reason to file for divorce.
That could be because social attitudes are changing around marriage — specifically, around being stuck in one.
"No one wants to compromise or get married for the sake of it," Eric Klinenberg, a sociologist at New York University, told Insider. "There's far less social pressure to settle down today."
The study comes as Americans have racked up over $15 trillion in debt as of January, or about $155,622 per household — up 6.2% from a year ago. Home mortgages and student loans are the biggest culprits. In addition to credit scores, this debt is hurting love in America. After all, with less social pressures, it seems most people would rather be debt-free than married.
Mortgages and student debt are bad for romance
The majority of debt came from home mortgages by the end of 2021, at 10.44 trillion U.S. dollars. But most mortgage debt is owned by couples; single people accounted for only a quarter of first-time homebuyers as of 2017, according to the National Association of Realtors.
Next up: student debt. More than 43 million Americans have racked up over $1.7 trillion in student debt, as of March 2021. That's 1 in 8 Americans, according to July 2021 US Census Bureau data. Most class of 2019 college graduates — 62% — left school with student debt, according to the Institute for College Access and Success, a nonprofit organization seeking to make higher education more affordable. And 2019 graduates owed an average of $28,950 each.
That's a problem that affects younger adults in particular, with those between the ages of 25 and 34 being the most likely to hold student debt. In terms of the sheer volume of debt, however, people between the ages of 35 and 49 are the deepest in the red, cumulatively owing more than $600 billion, according to federal data. By extension, they may be more vulnerable to marriage issues down the line.
"Student loans can really hold you back," Jacqueline Newman, managing partner of Berkman Bottger Newman & Rodd in New York, told CNBC in 2018, saying that debt can especially influence newly married couples and delay their buying a home or having kids.
Debt is just another reason young people are less marriage-inclined
Americans aren't just avoiding marriage because of their partners' debt — they're considering divorce later on. 54% of respondents to the survey said that having a partner in debt is a major reason to consider divorce.
It's not just about the budget. Debt takes a powerful toll on Americans' mental health, with 7 in 10 people saying that they felt like they have a "black cloud" hanging over them when they have to pay a bill or loan. The same percentage of people feel that debt has "permanently" affected them mentally.
Taking time to find the right partner and prioritize their financial success is leading many millennials and Gen Zers to marry later in life than their parents and grandparents did.
Nearly three-fourths of younger survey participants in a Allstate/National Journal Heartland Monitor poll from 2015 said that financial security should come before marriage, while only 55% of older Americans felt the same.
And nearly half of lawyers surveyed in 2016 by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers said they noticed an increase in prenups among millennials.
"Usually there's some relationship stuff that's going on, and then on top of that, they start to complain about the debt," Taetrece Harrison, a family law attorney at Harrison Law Group, told Student Loan Hero in 2018. "I don't think [student loan debt] would be the driving factor, but it's definitely a secondary factor."